If you understand how pokies work then you know that they are designed to pay out at a certain (predetermined) rate – usually around 90c to the dollar. What this means is that pokies will, over time, average their wins and losses so that for every say $1000,000 put into the machine, $900,000 has been paid out and the machine has made a $100k profit for the pub/club owners. Over time the payout rates of individual pokies will rise and fall – averaging out at the 90% Return rate after many many years. This of course means that during that time the machine could go through periods where it consistently paid out higher than average returns (as it attempts to bring the average back to 90% after consistently not paying out for example)
Well the owners of a pub in Queensland claim to have just such a machine – in fact they reckon it’s the luckiest pokie machine ever!
Luckiest Pokie Machine or Another Tall Aussie Tale?
Beachmere Hotel have hailed it the luckiest pub in Queensland as the owners claim a string of wins ‘unprecedented of late’ surely puts their humble pub on top of the list
But is it the luckiest in the state?
Beachmere Hotel Keno & Pokie Wins
Beachmere Hotel director Robert Comiskey said it had earned the title of the luckiest pub in Queensland after a $2.09 million Keno jackpot win on November 18 €” the second worth more than $2 million in four years.
On the same day a different patron won almost $11,000 on poker machines, making it the eighth time someone had won more than $10,000 in the last two years.
There have also been a number of significant Keno jackpots over the past 12 months including a $155,616 nine-number jackpot.
According to the Queensland Government website there is up to a one in seven million chance of winning the top prize on a poker machine and one in 8,911,711 chance of getting the 10 number jackpot on Keno.
We are big advocates of gambling responsibly but with odds like this, if you were feeling lucky it would make a lot of sense to try out your luck,Mr Comiskey said.
Amazingly though, all these wins are not enough to secure the Moreton North region the title of luckiest region in Queensland when it comes to playing and winning on the pokies
And The Winner Is…
According to the Queensland Office of Liquor and Gaming Regulation, that honour goes to the Logan-Beaudesert region.
While Gold Coast topped the volume of money returned in metered wins in October this year with $28,816,132.34, it did so with 5991 machines operating. That places the Glitter Strip at fourth on the wins per pokie machine by region with $4809.90.
Logan Beaudesert topped the best returns by machine list with $6036.58, followed by Brisbane South with $5707.15.
And Where did Moreton North End up?
A tidy third with $4972.36 wins per machine (which would be even better at the Beachmere drinking hole).
OK, Just Don’t End Up Here:
And as for the regions to avoid, it is best to not try your luck in the Darling Downs-Maranoa area. The 1347 poker machines there sit bottom on total money returned ($3,263,773.34) and returns per machine ($2422.99)
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Is that 3 dynamite sticks I see? Scoring the feature on Aristocrat's Where's The Gold Pokies is why we play the game in the first place – it's the same for the thousands of pokie players around the world who rate this game so highly when listing their favourites, hardly surprising considering it’s awesome in every way. Every way but one – one big stinky noticeable way.
Choice Should Be an Integral Part of Life and Not Just a Feature
As much as I love getting the feature when playing Where's the Gold Pokies, there is an element of it that used to torment me to no end. So much so in fact that this mocking passenger would more often than not take the wheel and drive me to the brink only to leave me in a corner somewhere, curled up in the fetal position and laughing like a bona fide lunatic
I Choose… The WORST Character Possible!!?!
Seriously?!! It’s almost a gift – a gift that noone wants and is non returnable because my ability to pick the WORST character when playing Where’s the Gold Pokies is uncanny. But it’s the consistency with which I pick the losing character that drives me to the point where I’m having an in-depth conversation with 4 spatulas whilst fighting off a monkey who’s been trained in the art of SCUBA. Hectic
One Feature – Many Creatures
They say that too many cooks will spoil the broth and when it comes to picking the winning character during the where’s the gold pokies feature it seems the old adage applies…. that is it would apply if the cooks in question where game characters and the ‘broth’ that is destined to be spoilt was the resulting feature.
OK so in hindsight it seems the old adage doesn’t apply here.
Like at all.
oh well, different folks for different strokes… no wait! …. (oooh this is good. Wait for it)
‘Different Features for Different Creatures’
BOOM! Saved it – and saved it magnificently I might add 😉
Speaking of game characters, let’s meet the team at Where’s the Gold Feature HQ
Where’s The Gold Game Characters
There are 6 characters that make featured appearances during the Where’ the Gold Free Game mode – and since there are only enough slots for 5 characters you have to wonder whether Aristocrat like conflict, hate prospectors or it’s just an unhealthy combination of them both? I like to entertain the idea that the game makers at Aristocrat just can’t count. Maybe it’s just me but the thought of pokie game developers who can’t count is amusingly ironic.
You’ve informally met 5 of the guys above, but allow me to formally introduce them all to you, starting of course with the lady who was rudely left out of the above image meeting
‘Where’s The Gold?’ – Let’s Meet 6 Characters Who Desperately Want to Know
Stinky Pete … That Cheeky sod! Stinky Pete the prospector is a familiar face in the halls of Disney Pixar studios and has an open contract for Toy Story 5 through 28. He does not however feature during the Where’s the Gold Free Spins
Where’s The Gold Free Spin Features
Pictured left is the feature as it begins and yet another example showing how I pick the best (most winningest) game character for the free game feature. Keep reading to find out the key to picking the winner everytime – you’ll be surprised how obvious it is 😉
The free spins bonus feature is triggered when three or more scattered dynamite symbols land anywhere on the reels. Players will be awarded up to a maximum of 10 free spins with all wins in the free spins round tripled. In order to reveal the exact number of free spins you will be awarded you will be taken to a separate screen with five interesting and varied characters standing in a row.
At this point you need to choose between one of the 5 characters presented on the screen who will proceed to ‘pan for gold’ – where the ‘gold’ is the total number of free games awarded and the symbols that will substitute to wilds during the free games.
“Yes that’s wonderful and all – but how do we know which one of these characters is going to be the most generous when providing free games and substitute symbols?”
Would You Believe Me If I Told You?
If I told you what the secret to picking the winning character in Where’s The Gold was – would you even believe me? Amazingly when I shared this secret with my real world gambling friends they told me to stop talking out of my arse and proceeded to ignore all the advice I was trying to share with them!!?!?
I guess the expression “if it seems too good to be true it probably is” is advice we heed at our own detriment. 😉
Assuming you have no intention of doing anything to or at your own detriment – continue reading because I am about to disclose the one secret that reveals which game character is going to win the most during the Where’s the Gold Free Game Feature
The Secret To Picking The Winner Is…
The key to picking the winning character – or should I say to discovering which character is going to be the winningest lies in…
The Mine Shaft and how the light comes down the tunnel. There I said it – but allow me to expand on this secret a little more so that you can understand what clues to look for and how to translate them accordingly.
The Secret is Mine – But You Can Have it Too
When you first get the free spin feature on Where’s the Gold Pokies you have to make a decision between the 5 characters moving about in front of you. Behind these characters is a background that for all intents and purposes is a static image that provides no interaction or animation – at least that’s what they want you to think.
Look carefully at the beam of light that comes down the mine shaft and you’ll notice that whilst the direction and illumination remain the same, the shape the light beam makes on the mine floor has slight variances that mirror the shadow made by whomever the winning character happens to be in each case.
Look In The Shadows and See The Light
It’s hard to explain how this works and even the screenshots I have provided don’t portray the same clarity you get when actually viewing the game but bear with me and soon you’ll begin to get an idea of what I’m on about and more importantly – how you can apply this to your own gameplay and successfully pick the winning character next time you get the feature
The winning character in this case was Peter Panner and if you look closely at the shape of the light coming down the mine shaft you can see how it is circular in nature and the same rough diamater as Peter’s shadow.
The shadows for each character is unique for a reason, and the sooner you realise this the sooner you can use the information to your advantage.
I have attached a few more photos showing the results of the ‘gold panning’ and ask that you take some time to view them – no amount of explanation from me (other than what I have provided so far) will give you the knowledge that studying these images and testing the theory for yourself can provide.
Pick the Winning Character by Finding the Pattern
In this instance it is Nugget Ned who is our winningest character – and again the clues have been provided by Aristocrat and are evident within the shape of the light coming down the mine shaft.
Want Proof It Works? How About Video Evidence
Below I have screen recorded myself playing the Free Aristocrat Pokies in the Heart of Vegas and when I got the feature (took long enough sheesh!) I used the clues provided by Aristocrat to ascertain the winning character, picked it and went on to enjoy larger wins than I would have got had I picked a lesser character.
GO ME – but after reading this guide and learning the secrets for yourself it will soon be a case of GO YOU.
Want to Test my Theory?
Play Where’s The Gold Pokies Online now and see for yourself just how NOT full of crap I am. CLICK HERE to access Where’s the Gold and a host of other award winning games from Aristocrat, Microgaming, and iGT to name but a few.
No I'm not super excited at the prospect of writing you this guide and sharing my tips on how (and why) I have so much success playing Where's the Gold – the pokie from Aristocrat Gaming, although I must admit I'm kinda looking forward to it a bit – anything that gives money back to the punters and takes it from the pockets of Aristocrat, iGT and Bally's (to name but a few of the big slot machine manufacturers) is a good thing in my book and therefore yes I suppose I am looking forward to writing this – maybe I just wanted to use the word prospect in a sentence – that's probably it 😉
But Yee Haw indeed because today I'm talking about my favourite pokie – the one and only Where's the Gold, the slot machine from Aristocrat Leisure with a feature that gives you a choice – and provides you the opportunity to kick yourself for choosing the WRONG BLOODY CHARACTER again!
The problem is I’m not actually sure where this key is and so far my attempts to figure out how to pick the correct character have proven both fruitless and irritating.
Where's The Gold? – The Other Prospector Nearly Took The Lot!
In breaking news – the Prospector from Toy Story 2, otherwise known as Stinky Pete has tried to infiltrate the inner sanctums of Aristocrat gaming. Pretending to be the original Where's the Gold Prospector he Yee Hawed' his way past security and was almost at the Gold (the location of which is kept a closely guarded secret by Aristocrat) before his inability to bend at the elbows gave him away.
Sources inside Aristocrat say that he was relatively calm when being escorted out of the building and are now in the process of moving the gold to yet another top secret location for fears that the news of Stinky Pete's break in will spread and may be the catalyst needed to encourage some of the worst criminal masterminds from the past to come out of retirement. There's even whispers in the back alleys of Las Vegas that the Hamburglar and stand over man Grimace have joined forces again and are planning something MacNasty.
Watch this space! … or click that image below and play some where’s the gold – or at least the algternatives that allow you to choose between free and real money pokies – or you can check out Heart of Vegas Slots – the free app that allows you to play your Favourite Aristocrat pokies through Facebook and your mobile or laptop. Check out our Heart of Vegas Review and then get the secrets to Unlimited Free Coins
For those of you who haven’t yet heard about Heart of Vegas Slots – the social casino/Facebook App that so far provides over 10 million active players with access to over 60 amazing titles from Aristocrat Leisure, the makers of Australia’s favourite pokies …. then ummm, yeah. How’s life under your rock?
Seriously though, if you enjoy even an occasional punt on the pokies then you will be well versed with Aristocrat Gaming and the plethora of award winning pokie games they produce. (Learn more about Aristocrat and what Len Ainsworth attributes their success to at this link here) Furthermore, you’ll probably have a few favourites of your own – and I’ll bet one of them is either 5 Dragons, Big Red or Queen of the Nile 😉
Unless you’re a bit slow on the uptake (or you genuinely do live under a rock and it’s taking a while to roll the damn boulder back into place) you will have put two and two together and realised that with Heart of Vegas Slots App you can play Aristocrat Pokies Totally Free – but like most of the free things in life there’s a catch… or in this case a credit basket with a hole in it…
Welcome to Heart of Vegas Slots – Have Some Free Coins
When you first log in to Heart of Vegas it generally requires that you connect via your Facebook account – a completely normal and acceptable process in this social gaming and interconnected world we live in – and as part of this connect you are given 2 million Free coins – or HoV Credits as I like to call them (they are not coins or real money after all) and if you are like myself or any of the other millions of players out there you will excitedly spend the lot of your 2 million free credits within an hour or so – leaving you staring at your iPad and wondering why on earth the bets are as high as $1,000,000 a press?!?! – no really?! – check out our Heart of Vegas Slots Review where we rant a bit about this (among many other things LOL) – because trust me, you’ll be so stoked with the fact you can finally play your favourite Aristocrat Pokies from the comfort of your home or the bus home from work that you’ll spend the lot before you realise you were even getting low in the first place. And then you’ll be like …. well like Chris Rock below 😀
Luckily though the free coins and daily credits just keep on coming…. slightly anyway.
Welcome Back to Heart of Vegas – Have Some More Free Coins
Not only do you get to enjoy 2 million free coins from Heart of Vegas to play the many awesome titles from Aristocrat Pokies, the daily wheel provides you the chance to spin up to 250,000 Hov Credits – and this is on top of up to 60,000 extra credits just for having friends and coming back repeatedly! It seems the guys at Aristocrat and Heart of Vegas are looking after the free social casino crowd… at least that’s the impression they want you to get.
The True Value of Heart of Vegas Coins
The key to any good magic trick is misdirection. Create your illusion and then remember to keep your audience focused on that which is not important and you can get away with murder – well sort of anyway. And this is exactly what Aristocrat have done with the Heart Of Vegas Slots app – created the illusion of wealth while using free coins and daily bonus wheels to keep us distracted from the fact that the value of the ‘credits’ we deal with in this virtual social casino world are arbitrary at best.
While we’ve all been living in the same world (generally speaking) and applying the same values to things, the people over in the social casino world are dramatically shifting what that implied value is – and in so doing are creating a false sense of hope and a detachment from reality that can actually reinforce real money gambling in many players. Wait what?!?
Yeah WTF Dude?! – OK seems I have spent too long looking at stats, facts and figures because my world has been reduced to mere proportionate numbers, relative metrics and other confusing shit I haven’t thought about since high school!
Basically the problem (as we alluded to in our initial rant and the official Heart of Vegas Slots Review <– Follow that link people) is that the amount you gamble for each press of the button is … well it’s ridiculous quite frankly.
Would you ever bet $2500 for every press of the pokie if you were playing for real cash? Hell no, and no-one in their right mind would either. Well that staggeringly huge amount of money is the LEAST AMOUNT YOU CAN BET – with the highest amounts in the Hi-Roller room being in excess of $50,000,000 a press – yes you read that right, that’s FIFTY MILLION DOLLARS!
*Imagine how many sharks with freaking laser beams attached to their heads that would buy!
50 Million dollars?!?! Well shit, we’d better figure out a way to get more than a 1 or 200,000 free HoV credits each day then hadn’t we!
How To Get Millions of Free Coins Every Day!
The key to accessing over $5 million Heart of Vegas free coins each and every day is friendship.
Be a good friend and love thy neighbour and.… fuck that, take your Kumbaya loving hippy crap and stick it in a pipe and smoke it – or whatever it is you do.
Friendship is important in life, and now that we’ve got Heart of Vegas Slots on Facebook, friendship is more important than ever – because for every friend you have that plays HoV you can get 50,000 free coins (assuming they are good gifters*)
From Little Thing, Big Things Grow
Some prefer to use the power of the sun combined with a chemical reaction (in this case photosynthesis) to grow. There are also some that choose steroids or enhanced drugs to increase or ‘aid’ their growth – and others still who use others to build themselves up (to their detriment and otherwise). But today we’re focusing on those of us who like to grow …their Heart of Vegas Balance!
$50,000 Heart of Vegas Coins is nothing – in fact it’s two presses of Big Red or Queen of the Nile – at a minimum! but as the many expressions go – it all adds up, every little bit counts and as many need reminding, You can’t make friends with salad. Remember this and you’ll see it play out each and every day as your Heart of Vegas Free Coins come flooding in to provide you a healthy Balance that is constantly getting topped up – assuming you’ve used Facebook to make friends and not salad.
Seriously though…. Friends do this for you… EVERY DAY
Later that same day…
And the next day…
And the next day… or maybe this was later on the same day? – meh – too many Heart of Vegas Free Coins to keep up. #Firstworldproblems much 😀
Facebook Friends. How Many HoV You Got?
Let’s all take a moment to appreciate how freaking awesome that Pun of mine is….. and of course the rhetorical question contained within…..
And now allow me to answer that rhetorical question…… (what? – don’t even go there, seriously it’s been a long day OK)
How To Get Heart of Vegas Friends Who Gift
The key to maximising the amount of free coins you get each and every day is in finding friends on Facebook who are not only active HOV Players but also who actually use the ‘gift’ function to share the $50,000 Free Coins that each ‘gift’ generates.
Facebook Groups are the key to maximising your HoV Friends list and keeping it full of regular gifters and other players who genuinely love the game for the game sake and gift because they like getting the free coins in return. In fact I’d recommend these groups to anyone who just wants to play the game without any political BS or idiotic trolls making life irritating – which seems to be the norm for most hobbies and online activities these days.
To find Heart of Vegas Gifters you only need use the search function in Facebook – and I’d recommend running a search query for both ‘Heart of Vegas’ and ‘HoV’ as you wil find many groups under both terms. Then simply request to join and when y ou do make sure you actively add people as friends.
Here is an example of a good (and highly active) Group designed specifically for HoV players to grow their ‘friends who play HoV and Gift’ list –> HOV Daily Gifter Group – Add For Friends (no really, that is the name of the group)
I would recommend creating a new friends list in Facebook and keeping your HoV activity seperate to your regular feed – unless you want to tell your friends and family you play Heart of Vegas… over and over and over and over again?*
*Only funny when the game you are playing is Groundhog day or something 😉
How I generate $5 – $10 Million in Heart of Vegas Free Coins Every Day
Your Gift inbox will hold up to 100 Gifts – which if you’ve done the maths (and I know you have, you’re a pokie player after all) equates to $5000,000 in Heart of Vegas Free Coins.
*Do this twice a day and generate $10,000,000 in Heart of Vegas Free Coins every single day – oh and that’s not even counting the hourly 10,000 you collect or the daily allegiance bonuses and other random free coin gifts that HoV Slots occasionally does.
Then I usually make this face…
Whether you are playing for fun or stress relief, to simply kill time or you are doing it for Sparta – the fact remains :
And even though I know I should save the free coins or at least start with smaller bet increments so as to make the enjoyment of playing the free pokies last, Ain’t NOBODY got time for that!
Besides, I’ll just get another 10 million free coins tomorrow. BOOM
Heart of Vegas Slots – My Big Wins and Memorable Moments
Morning my fellow HoV players – thought I’d do something a little different from the typical reviews and write ups that so many players provide about Heart of Vegas and share the more fun side of this free social casino app – the big wins and awesome features I have got whilst playing the game. Keep in mind these are proportionate to the fact I can never afford to bet more than 50k a hit LOL
I ENCOURAGE YOU TO SHARE YOUR BIG WINS AND JACKPOTS – keep in mind these are proportionate to the fact I can never afford to bet more than 50k a hit LOL
So without further ado, please enjoy my biggest wins and most memorable moments whilst playing the free social casino app Heart of Vegas Slots. – Oh and for those who have no idea what I am talking about – fill yourself in on everything by first reading about Aristocrat and Heart of Vegas Slots and then get the low-down on what it is really like to play over at PlayPokies.com.au – Australia’s home for Aristocrat Pokies online.
And now allow me to share with you some of my favourite moments and biggest wins from playing Heart of Vegas Slots
My Biggest Heart of Vegas Slots Wins
First image shows a $6million+ win FROM ONLY $12K BET – did this when I got the entire screen filled with WILD coins during the feature – amazing stuff!
Second image shows another awesome win – this time on 5 Dragons – and shortly after the last win – credits at this point were at an all time high of 13million+
Third image is just cool – 5 Dynamite feature symbols at once for a healthy win – but not that healthy cause I ALWAYS CHOOSE THE WORST CHARACTER LOL
*Learn How to pick the right character every time with our Where’s The Gold Pokie Guide
Fourth and final image shows my first ever Progressive Jackpot – shortly after this I got 5 Aces 6 times over and the final symbol was a progressive so I actually won the minor $600k jackpot 6 times over!
Feel free to share your own big pokie wins and Heart of Vegas awesome moments
Where & How To Play Aristocrat Pokies Free – And Why You Won’t
Today I’m going to show you where you can access and play Aristocrat Pokies online for free for as long as you like with no strings attached and no need to sell your first born child or sacrifice your neighbours goat – or any of that stuff.
I’m also going to show you why it’s not what we’d hoped and point out the biggest mistakes Aristocrat made when transitioning their much loved pokie games to the social casino world of online gambling and mobile casino apps.
Don’t get me wrong, I think this social casino app has its good points and does provide a modicum of entertainment when I’m stuck on the train of an evening, but overall I’m incredibly disappointed – not just with the options provided but also with the way the games play (and the inherent player experience that this provides). In fact I’d go so far as to say that the only part of this free mobile slots app that speaks any truth is the word “HEART” because I swear this annoying mobile pokies app will get your blood boiling and have you seeing red in no time at all.
But before we dive into the nitty gritty of the game let’s take a quick look at what it is and where it came from…..It’s time to learn about The Birds and the Bees of Heart of Vegas Slots
Aristocrat Gaming and Heart of Vegas Slots
Heart of Vegas is an online social app available through Facebook as well as the Google Play store and Apple iTunes making it yet another of a myriad of free online pokies and casino slots games that can be accessed and played on any device through social accounts like Facebook or Google+
Originally owned by Product Madness Incand purchased by Aristocrat to launch their Heart of Vegas app (which of course contained all their much loved and globally popular pokie games like Big Red, 5 Dragons and Queen of the Nile (to name but a few) – the acquisition (in September of 2014) – see Source at Yahoo Finance
Heart of Vegas a Reel Success
In the month since the Heart of Vegas app was launched on iOS„¢ for iPad„¢, the app has reached the top 50 in overall top grossing apps in the U.S. and top 15 grossing casino apps in the U.S.
“Aristocrat is all about delighting players with great gaming content. Heart of Vegas„¢ has been a runaway success, bringing our world class games to Facebook players everywhere. The early success of the iOS„¢ app builds on that momentum and provides further evidence of the growing importance of social and mobile gaming to Aristocrat’s broader strategy,” said Craig Billings, Aristocrat’s Chief Digital Officer.
With the introduction of the iOS app„¢, users can play both on Facebook and on iPad using the same account, adding more convenience and options for Heart of Vegas„¢ players.
Heat of Vegas quickly became the best selling and highest rated social casino app on iTunes. Note that the image shows 2013 but this should read 2014
Over the next 12 months up to the beginning of 2015 Aristocrat and their online identity ‘Product Madness’ have truly taken over the social casino market with their award winning app now available on Android, iPhone and MAC computers. And where there used to be 11 of the popular Aristocrat pokies available to play for free, players can now choose from over 60 (yes SIXTY!!) popular titles.
Aristocrat Have a $123 million win …on Free Pokies!
As the big wigs of Aristocrat Gaming counted their profits and losses as of September 2015 they were pleasantly surprised to find their (not so) new social gaming app [Heart of Vegas had helped improve revenue by 145.3% over the previous year,
contributing AU$123.4 million in revenue to Aristocrat's overall financial achievements for 2015.
Aristocrat explained further that the positive performance of the Heart of Vegas apps is a result of the successful strategic acquisition of VGT, which delivered both revenue and profit growth.
Aristocrat and Product Madness Dominate Social Casino Market
As a backgrounder, Aristocrat had acquired San Francisco-based social casino games developer Product Madness in 2012. Being the publisher of several widely played Facebook-based social casino games, the Product Madness acquisition enabled Aristocrat to reinforce its online gaming foothold by entering the social casino market.
At the time of the acquisition, Product Madness already ranked as one of the top five social casino slot operators at Facebook, having more than 500,000 active users daily, and about 3.5 million active users on a monthly basis. Aristocrat reports that today, the average number of active daily users has grown to 799,840, while actual users at year-end has reached 1.089 million. Daily revenue generated average at 38 U.S. cents or 0.53 AU cents per user.
Product Madness proclaims in its website that the Heart of Vegas social casino app remains the Number 1, top grossing iOS social casino app in Australia and among the top five highest grossing social casino apps in the U.S. market. Aristocrat's Chief Digital Officer Craig Billings had previously commented during the launch of the Heart of Vegas iOS app that it is a huge success at Facebook. Mainly because app users are given access to a number of free-to-play versions of Aristocrat's most popular land-based slot machine games, via the FB and mobile gaming platforms.
Boring Business Blurbs and blah-blah-blah
The Chief Executive Officer of Aristocrat, Mr. Jamie Odell said he foresees further growth in overall digital revenue, as he anticipates further increase in the Heart of Vegas app's number of active daily users. Still, the Aristocrat CEO maintains a conservative view by saying that the average revenue realised from active daily users and the related margins will temper throughout 2016, as Aristocrat matures into new channels and hits scale.
Not-So-Boring Aristocrat Pokies you can play for free!
Want to know what we think of the games as well as see individual reviews and tips for the 10 or so we like (hey, you think we’re going to review and give you hot tips for all 66 titles?!
Check out our in-depth Heart of Vegas Slots Review and we’ll not only show you what pokies payout the most, we’ll also share some tips on getting the most free daily credits possible – because unless you want these free pokies to start costing some serious coin you are going to need all the free credits you can get. Simply CLICK HERE to check it out.
Tell em’ they’re dreaming son! (and that you don’t care that they saw it in the Trading post for 150 bucks.)
One could say it’s the perfect pokie for Home & Away but then one is already due for a good thumping for bad puns and dad jokes so ‘one’ shall just shutup and be over in the corner if you need him….
We recently posted an article that highlighted the most popular Aristocrat Pokies and other branded games that Australians love to play both online and down at the local pub – and you can check out the article here.
What this article did – apart from remind us how successful and popular the Aristocrat brand is – was point out that when it comes to Aussie favourites, there is nothing patriotic about our choices, and in fact if Big Red was not on the top ten list I’d be inclined to say it was a very un-Australian list indeed.
And that got us drinking thinking….
A True Blue Australian Pokie?
What if they made a real Australian themed pokie machine? And I’ not talking cliched images of the outback and kangaroos here either – Big Red already has that aspect of things covered – no, what if there was a pokie that was quintessentially Australian – to the point that even if it was placed in the main casino floor of a major Vegas casino you could still pick it as being ‘as Australian as getting knocked out by a Sheila in thongs’
And then we thought about the bloke who’s so Australian he’d tell that Sheila in thongs to “shut up and get me a beer” and proceed to throw down 12 beers, a meat pie, 3 Kebabs and a bag of chips (Seagulls don’t pester this bloke) while watching the cricket and playing 2-up…
That man of course is none other than Alf Stewart, the main character on Home & Away – who hasn’t changed a bit in the 30 odd years the show has been broadcasting! (Read the Alf Stewart Wiki for more detailed information)
Introducing the Latest Australian Pokie Machine to Hit Casino floors and pubs around the country – ‘The Alf Stewart’
One could say it’s the perfect pokie for Home & Away but then one is already due for a good thumping for bad puns and dad jokes so ‘one’ shall just shutup and be over in the corner if you need him….
Alf Stewart Pokies – The Perfect Punt at Home & Away
I was ummm, I’m just introducing this new pokie to everyone Alf. Sorry mate, thought I’d surprise you
well this is awkward….
Tell you what Alf, let me show you some of the bonuses, features and free spins on offer with our new Alf Stewart Pokie and maybe you’ll come around to the idea.
Alf Stewart Pokies – Features & Free Spins
The Alf Stewart Pokie is a 243 Reel ways (Aristocrat patented) game set out in the typical fashion of most modern 5 reel video slot machines and has one of the most interactive features you’re likely to find anywhere – with stacked reels and retriggers providing the player a chance to win up to 100 Free Spins with locking wild symbols multiplying wins up to 10 times!
The Feature is triggered when you collect 3 or more ‘Flamin Galahs’ on any payline (paying left to right) – and additional free spins can be triggered during the free games for even more pokie wins.
So you see Alf, this new Online Pokie bearing your name is actually a bloody awesome game that punters across Australia are going to love. And in typical Demtel fashion it gives me great pleasure to say Alf – “But wait, there’s more”
Activate the Bonus Game for More Pokie Wins!
Not only does the Alf Stewart Pokie game come with amazing stacked bonus symbols and free spins with the chance of additional free spins being triggered there is a bonus game that is unlocked when any 2 of the Flamin Mongrol symbols appear – anywhere at all. Once unlocked you can choose between two bonus games – HOME, and AWAY.
Even Alf thinks this is a bloody ripper idea and only a bunch of pooftahs would disapprove – flamin’ flaming fags’* (all said in jest, we have nothing against the LGBT community)
Unlocking Home & Away Bonus Games
Alf doesn’t like being kept waiting so you only have 30 seconds to make a decision here. If nothing is chosen then Alf appears on the screen telling you what a flamin’ useless drongo you are and then chooses AWAY – since you were clearly not ‘HOME’ when asked to make a decision.
Appearing anywhere within the reels, 2 flamin’ Mongrols will unlock the bonus games which provide more interactive play for the lucky punter. Let’s explore the bonus games in more detail.
Alf Stewart Pokies Bonus Game – ‘HOME’
In the HOME bonus game you have to help ‘SES’ Alf battle the constant onslaught that Summer Bay suffers from. Whether it’s fighting bushfires, diffusing a car bomb, removing the termite infestation from the Summer Bay Diner the people of Summer Bay are HOME and need their SES Hero to ‘Get rid of the flamin flames!’
Alf Stewart Pokies Bonus Game – ‘AWAY’
Look out for this symbol and then be ready for a barrage of Flamin’ Crows – but don’t let too many get ‘AWAY’ 😉
In AWAY you have to ‘Stone the Flamin’ Crows as they fly through the screen. Utilising the latest touch screen interactive technology we have created one of the most engaging bonus games of any modern pokie machine allowing the user to engage with two large screens in an effort to prevent the Flamin’ Crows from reaching their nest – which for the record is in the old Summer Bay lighthouse and will eventually cause the light to break and lead to a major shipping disaster, oil spill, and the eventual destruction of Summer Bay’s underlying ecosystem…I imagine anyway.
How To Pick The Best Bonus Game
There is no secret or strategy that we can share that will tell you which bonus game is the better option, it really is up to chance and comes down to your personal preference. The odds are the same for both games and are also as random. Our only advice is to ask yourself what millions of devoted fans ask themselves every day – WWAD?
Alf Stewart Pokies – Let’s Talk Money
Denominations Accepted –
First things first, if you think the Alf Stewart Pokie machine will accept your flamin’ counterfeit hunjies with the flamin’ lamington plate and picture of me – which I’d like to point out was used without my BLOODY PERMISSION ya pack of gallahs – then you’ve all got another bloody thing coming – streuth. Next thing you’re gonna tell me the bloody pooftah’s are allowed to marry each other or some such shit?!?! Bunch of mongrels – the lot of ya!
That being said, the Alf Stewart Pokie accepts all legal Australian bank notes but to keep with tradition and to provide you with a truly invasive interactive gambling experience the Alf Stewart pokie will reject your perfectly crisp and clean bank note at least 15 times.
The Alf Stewart Pokie does not accept coins as there’s no coin hopper and “garn git fucked if ya think I’m carrying around all that fucking spare change – shit, I ain’t that old yet ya bloody pelican!”
Alf Stewart Pokies Technical Specs
The Return to Player rate on the Alf Stewart Pokies is set to 97.3% which is one of the most generous RTP rates of any electronic gaming machine – online and offline. There are also the usual options for choosing how many lines you play and what the cost per press is – with the Alf Stewart Pokie being most popular in the 1c format allowing for 100credits with every $1 played.
So Alf… What do you think of the Alf Stewart Pokies now?
Ha ha hahaha… but seriously, what specifically did you want to know?
Stay Tuned for Alf Stewart Pokies II – where you’ve got twice as much chance of winning thanks to our association with Microgaming and their Progressive Slots Network – with a chance of becoming an instant millionaire.
Bet your mates won’t be calling you a flamin drongo anytime soon when you take home in excess of $10 million USD
When it comes to Pokies and Slot Machines there is only really one or two names that come to mind – three if you are a regular punter and frequent more than one or 2(00) establishments – but for the most of us regular players the major names familiar to us are Aristocrat, IGT and Ainsworth. Aristocrat is without doubt the king of the Pokies, especially here in Australia – and surprisingly the man who started the company, one Len Ainsworth also happens to be the owner and creator of the other big slot machine manufacturer Ainsworth Technology!
iGT is not as big as Ainsworth and Aristocrat but are still a popular manufacturer who’s pokies and slot machines can be found in pubs and clubs all across this great southern land. You can also find pokies from Konami – a manufacturer of console games who has made the move over to Electronic Gambliing Devices
In the early 1990’s there were several other brands such as Universal and Jubilee but these games have all but disappeared.
The Top Pokie Manufacturers
Aristocrat Gaming Technology
Founded in 1953 by Len Ainsworth, Aristocrat had perfect timing as pokies were legalized in New South Wales just 3 years later. The first machine to roll off the production lines was the Clubman which was followed by the Clubmaster a few years later. You can learn more about Aristocrat and get some insight into the secrets of their success in Australia (and around the world) by visiting our Aristocrat dedicated games page – with reviews and links to all the best Aristocrat Pokies. Simply follow THIS LINK HERE
In 1984 Aristocrat changed the face of gambling in Australia with the release of the first of what would become the modern day pokie. Today, their name is synonymous with pokies and their game library includes greats like Queen of the Nile, More Chilli and 5 Dragons.
While IGT was operating as a private company as far back as the 1950’s it was in 1981 when International Game Technology went public and made a major move into the slot machine industry. They are the number one game maker in the United States and are making inroads into the Australian market with great games such as Cleopatra and Major Money.
IGT enables players to experience their favorite games across all channels and regulated segments, from Gaming Machines and Lotteries to Interactive and Social Gaming. Leveraging a wealth of premium content, substantial investment in innovation, in-depth customer intelligence, operational expertise, and leading-edge technology, our gaming solutions anticipate the demands of consumers wherever they decide to play.
Ainsworth Game Technology
Founded by “Pokie King” Len Ainsworth (pictured above) in 1995 after leaving Aristocrat, Ainsworth Gaming has quickly become one of the top three game makers in Australia and is rapidly expanding around the world.
One of the trademarks of the Ainsworth games are their multi-level progressive jackpots with the Double Shot, Triple Shot and Quad Shot games being some of their most popular titles.
Other Slot Machine Manufacturers
While the three pokie manufacturers listed above are the biggest and most prominent there are some other companies that have either been big in the past or are just started to make an impact. These companies are;
Konami Once one of the top three, Konami pokies are now found less frequently. They entered the Aussie market in 1996 with popular games like Money in the Bank and Incan Pyramid.
Star Games / Shufflemaster / Bally Three big names in the gaming machine industry have merged into on with Bally now being a big US slot machine maker looking to make inroads into the Australian market. Top games include Kelly’s Fortune and Wold Mountain.
WMS Gaming Founded by Harry Williams in 1943, WMS Gaming’s pokies are now available in Australia. They even have a game development office in Sydney. Some of their top games are Zeus, Li’l Red and Jungle Wild.
Aruze Gaming Aruze Gaming have been in the Australian pokie market since 1989. Their games are not as commonly found as they once were although the new G-Series and G-Deluxe games might signal a comeback.
Online Pokies and Slot machine Manufacturers
When it comes to the world of online pokies and mobile slots we stop talking about manufacturers and focus on the actual sofware that powers the pokies and slots you have come to love. The physical machines that you see in the pubs, clubs and casinos work exactly (and I mean exactly) the same as the online pokies you play except there is no need for a physical machine. As such the manufacturers stick to the bricks and mortar world and leave the online casinos and pokies to the software companies to develop interactive gameplay and awesome online casino games to keep even the most fussy punter happy.
When it comes to online software companies who supply the casino games for you to enjoy real money pokies and slots there is only really 2 or 3 names worth mentioning. In fact I would go so far as to say that if the online casino of your choice does not run one of utilise one of these software companies then I would not even waste my time and money there.
The Biggest names in Online Pokies is Microgaming – with Playtech and NetEnt following closely behind.
Learn more about the best online pokies software companies in the followup article –> HERE and learn first hand why Microgaming and their Mega Moolah progressive slots game is the world’s most popular online progressive slots game
Are you looking to play free online pokies for fun and not sure where to look or what exactly constitutes fun when it comes to playing online pokies and slots? Today I’ll share with you the secrets to playing free online pokies – and you can decide for yourself whether it is totally FOR FUN or if you become so frustrated it ends up sounding more like FOR FU..CK SAKE!…
First I need to make sure we are on the same page regarding what fun actually means because while some people think it is enjoying yourself and having a good time, others take it a little far and think fun means you need to jump out of a plane or play chicken with traffic.
We’re Playing Pokies For Fun. If It’s an Adrenaline Rush You Seek…
If it’s an adrenaline rush you seek then may I suggest not doing the chores your wife/girlfriend is asking you to complete and maybe even leaving the toilet seat up consistently while dumping towels and all manner of wet clothes sporadically throughout the house. Not only do you get the thrill of elevated dopamine coursing through your veins and heightening the experience, you also get the thrill of not knowing when she is going to get you back…. which is like waiting for a feature anyway 😉
If it’s an adrenaline rush you seek then try not listening to your better half for a few hours. Trust me – it’s twice the rush with all the anticipation of waiting for a feature – except instead of 3 pyramids you’ll more likely get a stiletto to the head or something equally exciting.
If however you legitimately want to play free online pokies for fun then we recommend doing the only smart advice this article actually provides and visiting any of our recommended Online Casinos (where all Australians are welcome) and either enjoying free pokie downloads via their online casino software or accessing the casino through your smart phone and playing the mobile casino pokies no download – as the game streams live through their mobile casino app.
Check out our Best Australian Online Casinos Page and learn more about the best casinos currently offering real money and free online pokies for fun.
Aristocrat Pokies and Penny Slots – How to Play Your Favourite Aristocrat Games Online Completely Free!
This article was written in response to the many questions we get from our readers who want to know where and how they can play their favourite pokies like Queen of the Nile, Big Red, Lucky 88, Where’s The Gold and More Chilli online. There are various options and although playing them free is one of them, what this article aims to do is show you (without the BULLSHIT) exactly why you can ONLY play them for free and why this is actually not as good as we had hoped, namely because Aristocrat kinda stuffed up in their attempt to control their licensing and brand.
If you want to learn more about Aristocrat Leisure and see detailed reviews and write ups on the pokies that have made them famous then visit our Aristocrat Gaming Page where you will find similar links to below providing you access to the best free and real money Aristocrat Pokies online as well as reviews of the top ten Aristocrat Pokies – as voted by Australians everywhere.
Play Aristocrat Pokies Free
Those who are familiar with Aristocrat and the myriad of pokies and slot games they produce would struggle to disagree with the fact that Aristocrat Pokies are without doubt the most popular games that Australians have ever played. These games can be found played heavily inside the casinos of Australia, New Zealand and USA. The most widely played and popular Aristocrat games are without doubt the Queen of the Nile and 5 dragons while the bigger dollar punters love the $1 minimum and $10 maximum bet that comes with Aristocrat pokies like Big Red and Super Bucks (4 versions now of this popular $1 pokie machine)
You can learn more about these individual Aristocrat Pokies by visiting this page HERE but seeing as you came here to find out where you could play these games online for free and not to learn more about them I shall move on post haste 😉
Aristocrat Progressive Jackpots and Big Pokie Wins
Before we take a look at where you can play your favourite Aristocrat Pokies online I want to highlight something that as an Australian punter I find frustrating and kinda unpatriotic if I’m honest!
In America where the progressive jackpot systems are more common, the average win amount can be anywhere from 1 million to upwards of $15million – and that’s USD! Here however in Australia where ironically the amount spent on pokies and gambling is greater than all of the US combined (source) the amount one can potentially win on a progressive linked jackpot network is around $50,000 – chump change in comparison to the huge amounts offered in the US.
Don’t get me wrong, $50k is still $50k (in fact I have personally won the Lasseters Loot progressive – taking home $49,558.80 – Dead set! – follow this link to see evidence and hear how it happened) but compared to the million on offer in the states it is kinda sorta not really at all fair. Surely Aristocrat, a company that is 100% Australian owned and operated will make sure the jackpots offered to their own would be higher now.
Nope, not even close. While Australia continues to enjoy progressive jackpots that cap and reset at $50k, Aristocrat Leisure are providing the Americans with progressive jackpots with prizes in the millions! What gives Aristocrat?! That’s very unAustralian indeed. Streuth. In fact, Aristocrat themselves are so proud of their progressive jackpots that they proudly share the latest wins on their blog! Follow the link to read about the Buffalo Progressive Jackpot Wins and how 4 players have hit the big one in under 2 weeks!
That’s ummm, totally awesome and I am happy for these players but tell me again what this has to do with Australia and how this benefits me in any way?
It doesn’t! – unless you could somehow access the online versions and then connect to the active progressive network… but you can’t so let it go and move on. In fact the best way to move on is to learn about where we can access and play all the best aristocrat pokies and slots games online and if and where we can play the real money pokies version of these free online aristocrat slots games….
How To Access & Play Aristocrat Pokies Free
There are two different methods you can use that will provide you with unlimited access to the Aristocrat Pokies and penny slots games online. One method is about as official as you can get but has some serious disadvantages for the avid Aussie pokies punter while the other method, although not as formal and certainly not ‘official’ provides Aussie punters with a more realistic gambling experience and does a much better job of mimicking the experience you have come to know and love whilst playing your favourite Aristocrat Pokies at the local pub or club
Play Free Aristocrat Pokies and Slots with Aristocrat (Real Official Like)
Aristocrat have secretly been creating their popular real world pokies and casino slot games online and providing an incredible Android and Apple compatible app that allows players to join the ‘Aristocrat gaming floor’ and play nearly every Aristocrat Pokie you know. Because this is an App it does not allow players to gamble with real money and as such the only options for people within the ‘Heart of Vegas’ app is to buy pretend credits and play with these – or wait an hour for the system to give you free credits (which are equivalent to maybe 4 presses at most)
My Thoughts on the Heart of Vegas Slots App
I have been playing Heart of Vegas for a month now and my thoughts are less than impressive – with Aristocrat dropping the ball and failing to deliver in two areas. Sadly the two areas they have failed to deliver in result in an online gaming experience that is so far removed from the experience we have come to know and love at the local pub that it makes me question what their motives are and started me on the search for some real money alternatives so I could enjoy the same features, symbols and bonus games I had come to love from Aristocrat whilst giving me a complete gambling experience. And what are these two areas they have failed to deliver on? Gambling individual wins (the double up and suit feature) as well as the ability to choose how many lines you play. Sorry but that kinda RUINS EVERYTHING FOR ME! Of course that doesn’t mean you won’t like it – so check it out and tell us what you think.
Click the image to your left or THIS LINK HERE to access the HeartofVegasSlots.com website and automatically create your account (through Facebook or equivalent) and start enjoying free albeit restricted Aristocrat Pokies online
And this is why I went searching for a better free online alternative…
Play Free Aristocrat Pokies and Slots on Emulators
Playing the unofficial Aristocrat emulators online provides you with some options that sadly Aristocrat themselves failed to provide – and may I just say “poor form Aristocrat!”
The following emulators not only provide you with free credits that you can simply replenish as often as you like (no waiting an hour for free credits) but they also allow you to specify how many lines you want to play and whether you want to gamble your individual wins.
Suiting or doubling up our small wins and choosing what line and credit combination is one of the most crucial things to be able to control if you want to learn how to pick a winning slot machine and how to win on slots – and thanks to these free emulators you can do just that:
http://www.vegasslotsonline.com/aristocrat/ — This website is also equipped with all the popular games developed by Aristocrat
http://playaristocratpokies.com/ — A website focused solely on Aristocrat Pokies and Slots Games. You can play for free here.
How To Play Aristocrat Pokies for Real Money
As previously mentioned, Aristocrat have not licensed their award winning pokies and penny slots games to the online software companies that make the online casino games and online pokies (companies like Playtech, NetEnt, and Microgaming to name a few). As such the only way to play the Aristocrat Pokies that you know so well online is to play them free – either through the official Heart of Vegas app or the emulators provided by many sites (including those listed above). BUT…
It is no surprise that companies like Microgaming who know all too well how popular the Aristocrat Pokies are, have developed some of the best real money pokies alternatives to the Aristocrat games we know and love. These companies have made sure that the alterntive games they make have similar images, the same awesome bonus games and features and anything else that makes the game unique and loved by all. But then they make the games ever better than the offline counterpart by connecting them to progressive jackpot networks and providing constant incentives and player rewards. Below are our top recommended Australian Online Casinos that all use Microgaming software and therefore can provide the biggest and best range of alternatives to your Aristocrat favourite.
See our Online Casino Review page to learn more about these 4 online casinos and find out which one suits your individual needs and gambling style the best. Note that all use Microgaming and as such provide you with the best Aristocrat pokies alternatives online.
All of above mentioned websites give a bonus on your first deposit. Some offer a no deposit bonus upon signup while others give more than that. Some of them also give free spins for specific games. Have Fun & Good Luck!
Find out exactly we love our Aristocrat Pokies so much and check out our individual reviews and thoughts on the top rated Aristocrat Games below